If You Don't do it, You Don't Really Believe it. Some people spend their whole time searching for what's right, but they can't seem to find any time to practice it. Your life story is not written with a pen, but with your actions. To do nothing is the way to be nothing.

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

innocent child

reading some blog lately make me miss the time of all of us being all innocent. yes innocent. maybe growing up is tough, but hey, everyone have to go through it right? which have its downside.

ever any of you had a bad time at school? am sure some do but what bout the majority ? there are lots to miss from the high school days. if you throw a chair at someone, the next moment you will be the bestest of fren after, a "macha..." there are no such things as vengence, grudges, and all that. no mmu - mind manipulated uni. opps.. i havent learn the line thing that can make u cancel that. oh well.

i've been told " its hard to find real fren now" the reason the person gave is, lots have their own agenda,and people cant be sincere. well thats not MY opinion, so pls don put my head on the chopping block.

in life where adult or the older one,are to looked up upon and to be listen to advice, but i find it the total opposite. sometimes, opinion of the younger person seems wiser. hey, old is not always gold rite?

being innocent well, makes u feel so carefree, there are no strive to acheive something, earn the big cash, etc. personally, i feel like if we keep on thinking bout cash,even if its for motivation, we might get lost in it someday, and will be money minded freak. of course money is important, but there are not everything rite? take a chill pill, but don take too much like me, being to chill bout studies can never be good. when we are young, there are no motivation to be successful in studies. it just happen. i mean, to keep self far away from the "kiasu-ness", last time we just study, whenever our mom asked us to. instead now, " ok i study so i can beat the 4 flat dude", i don see the point of beating.instead why don coperate? if you are good enough, he/she might even work for u. the best CEO don have to be the smartest person in the world.

when you are young, you fall in love, and some might say it just puppy love, or infatuation.but being in love, so sweet and innocent,and young, everything or most of the thing just turn into a smile at every move or turn. but when older, there lots of deceiving, backstabing, cheating, just try watch the bold and beutiful lah. am sure not all relatonship are based on or drive on cash, and looks.but as we go older, the more we think, the more we know how to lie and hide our secret in the closet.which sucks really.ever wonder what happen to be innocent, and honest, where like those disney movies we see, all the princeses heart is at the prince charming's, such devotion.maybe some might say, thats all in the movies la.. but i know and heard and seeen it all happened before.

mama what is alcohol? or why that uncle walk like he is dancing? ever we tought of all that before we ever try all those stuff? alcohol, cigarrate, drugs, gamble, clubs.

those were the days. carefree life without any worries, and where mind on our imagination, which every lego we played, instead of what gonna happen, or what we gonna eat or who hates us.an empty white cloth. maybe its like ther mercs advert, life should start when we are old and ends when we are young.

all good things have to come to an end rite? things been well for me lately, but i guess i have to prepare myself for the bad time which can come at any time, although am not complaining if i am blessed with more good time, am riding the wave of happiness. when i woke up today, i felt so "senang" and was greeted by a Qantas airplane outside the clear blue sky.. wonderful.hope my good run with luck and happiness wont end, but den, am not the new kid on the block of the thing we all call life.

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

glory glory Man Utd

lots of people don really like Man utd for no apparent reason, but at the same time they have lots of supporters too.

no matter wat others might say, well " glory glory Man utd! and we are goin to Moscow !!" thats the FACT and not for braging

c'mon United!

clash of the titan. even though its just the semis, it appears to be a great match on paper, but what happen in the Nou Camp, is FAR from it. Man u should be more attacked minded this time. judging from the matches after the arsenal victory, United seems to be more negative, they are not their usual self free-flow attacking side like they used to be.no matter how the pundit predict how United have the advantage going in, in a 0-0 draw, i think its more of a disadvantage. i mean even if the score is 1-1 at Old Trafford, United will be knocked out due to the away goal rule. United have missed out the chance to attack at Spain, as away goal are so important, instead of a "proffessional" display. well, it all will b unveiled tonight who will go to Moscow. Hope the spirit of 99 will inspire everyone, and hope the players don get carried away in the league as well. As Liverpool never learn, the league is the bread and butter.
no more misses tonight eh? Mr. PFA of the year.

Monday, April 28, 2008

silver lining in troubled sky

They can say Anything they want to say,

Try to bring me down,

But I won't face the ground

I will rise steadily sailing out of their reach,

Although they do try,

How to make me feel that I,

Don't matter at all,

But I refuse to fall,

Tell me what I believe or loose faith in my dreams,

'Cause there's a light in me,

That shines brightly ..

"we are born in a world where fairness does not exist"- wong meisiem.

its true to a certain extend.corruption, bribe, and even reality shows, that based on pityness which is really pathetic. if the contestent is not good, just eliminate la, as harsh as it sound. but hey, lots of thing is not fair right? rather than me whine on how the world is not fair, am thankful that i have, things that i won't trade for anything in the world :

a girlfren that love me to bits even when i pissed her off,she will makes things better. i dono how but guess thats her magic.of course we have our ups and down, but thank God we able to works things out.miss u always and waiting for ur return. love u.

i always been known to be a mummy's boy. maybe since am the youngest and my mom always have a soft spot for me.and i know i always been attached to her. i know i have lots to say ever since i getting older, but i also know how u strive and always give others wat you have.and u don any penny on yourself, but i guess its true like the malay saying " syurga di bawah tapak kaki ibu"

the old man. even its pissing off sometimes how u love to order everyone around, i know its hard for u to balance out ur duty sometimes as a father.a father suppose to be the strict one, thus nobody wan go near u and talk to you like how we all talk to mom. and even if we don talk much other than, my studies, and sometimes if i ask about business, or Man u. i know, you like to be teman-ed whenever u go or watching man u match, hope we will be able to go to Old trafford one day, like how you said, just the two of us, or maybe bring "koko" if we watchin Man U vs Liverpool.
siblings are always a pain. but no matter how annoying they can be, i know we all will be united when any one of us in trouble.

in the troubled world, am lucky i have what i have. and they are all my number 1 priority.i come here to study, and if people find me uneasy, or annoying, i cant help it, as i am just being myself.the wise lil kid says that " as long as i know i don do anything wrong, that all matters" i was ammused, maturity don't come with age, it comes in the person's thinking. in the end, as a goodbye for the day, this is my blog, and i shall blog it the way i wanted. and if some might miss it, try read my very first post, am sorry if my blog don suit any of your taste, and at the same time, i don put a gun at your head to force u to read it do i? i respect all of the blogs i read, and i hope everyone respect mine too, again, this is my blog and i gonna do it my way. thanks and night.
out numbered, and outplayed, take a bow..

Thursday, April 24, 2008

italian 1 2 3

Italian is a really funny language. Over here, "ciao" means "hi", "si" means "yes", and "prego" means "you're welcome."
In Malaysia, "ciao" means "bird", "si" means "die", and "prego" is what happen when you forgot to use the condom last night.

the older brothers

after all the trouble in the past,

the accident,

the fight,

the stubborn headed,

the car,

later you would be flying to one of the most amazing city in the world,

finally you achieve something,

its never too late to start to achieving,

congrats and have a great trip

as they say it over there,


i know u been competing all of your life,

being the eldest, its obvious i get more of the attention you seek as am the youngest,

from studies,

to golf,

to driving,

everything you do to prove a point,

and yet i seems invincible,

but your are lucky to be able to fly,

bring me go flying,

like how you brought me driving,

and maybe i will call you " koko" again.

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

low key for prom

well, the enchanted night is not up to the par. sorry to say that, and to critize can be harsh if you are the one organising the prom, but hope, there are room to improve ya?

  • not organise. the VIP, is lost at the stage, is such an emberessment for him. why not have an usherer with him to accompany him from his seat, untill he seat down again after the speech? the coordination of the emcee and the time the food is serve is OFF!

  • do we really need a break dancing gang to perform?use that money and hire Sierra lah. they are the only good performer that night. PG165? they just average.and really nobody need them to jam while we eating dinner. a dinner suppose to be calm and peaceful not listening to some dude, screaming their lungs out. " dinner suppose to be jazzy"-asst director prom, melaka 08.and why the band end so fast? arent the event says the dance floor open till 12? we paid not to dance to some song played by the laptop!

  • since when prom be a chinese wedding dinner? hire at least and interesting emcee, to get the crowds attention instead of them "yam seng"-ing during speech, which is a bit rude. and the performance is not interesting thus, people are busy cam-whoring instead of listening to the song.
  • i know lots been complaining bout the food, but i don have any. i mean, i don have a very high hope. as if you really wanted to go for chinese meals, must go to a real chinese restaurant. maybe their western is 5star, but not chinese i suppose.and the waitress with lots of "excuse me" probably they are trained to be polite to guest but not trained to cut the fish i suppose.


as the Olympics looming, and the Olympic torch was in KL this week, everyone looks at China for the masterpiece of a showcase during the summer Olympic. other than that, the world's eye also on China due to the internal issue with Tibet. but since a few years ago, China have emerge from their nickname of the "sleeping Dragon" , and now can compete with the world's big player like USA or the British. it grows at such a great pace and the GDP grows like no other country have. lots of businesses and company have based there now.

with lots of company there, the competition is VERY tight. i have a question, "why China?" lots of say china this and that, that they are gonna be a super power, and we need to learn to speak chinese now so later we can deal with china. cut that crap, not to deny that china have a great volume, but with all the competiveness there, not many that can come on top.

i would say, why don we look at South east asia? its ridicilous, how people go crazy over china when we have at indonesia it self have about 100million people. if one company that could manopoly the business in South East Asia itself, wont that be sufficient enough? plus there are not many competition here, compared to China, thus a more success rate, its not easy but the chances is more here rather than to China.plus, with our country, is among one of the respected country in the region, for sure there are not much of red tape. sometimes we don't have to look so far away, because the grass is not always greener on the other side.

WHere is home?

where do i feel home? as in where is my comfort spot. well, the at engineering field, it don seem like home. yes, its good to be an engineer, a proffesional job. you can say it out loud to others "am an ENGINEER", but personally, its not my kinda thing. i mean, i don see myself dealing with circuits, and whole bunch of calculation mambo jambo.i know a few of my friends too feels the same. but why we are still here? for my case, well, the boss, the parents. i know some might say its my future, but its not as easy as that. when it comes to parents, certain things for sure will go their way, and leave us kids with no choice at all.

why do we study extra hard when we know we gonna work for somebody. everything is business. no matter if you work for Trump, Microsoft, your Intel, or Infieon, you still work for someone, and in the end, what matters is PROFIT. as meterialistic as that sounds, thats the harsh reality. and obviously the CEO will most likely be the one from the business background. yes the truth sucks. as we can see here in MMu, where the management student are very carefree, and have plenty of free time, while us engin student having a living hell. in the end, they will be our bosses. YES, am sure there are CEO's that are not from business background, but what about the majority? look at Tony Fernandes, he don need to be a pilot to run an airline.and yet makes great profit.thing is, he know the trade, he know the business trend, he knows what people want, and he knows the statergy to cash in the profit. and this is all been taught in business school. does he need to know how the airplane fly? he will just hire engineers to do maintainance for his fleet of planes. the best that his money can buy.

of course some might argue, hey look at bill gates. he create windows and microsoft, and now one of the richest man in the world. but take a look at the top 10 richest man in the world, how many like bill gates create something?

it might sound money minded with all this profit talks, but why do we study so hard? why our parents work hard? why some might lose it all-including bod just to get a promotion? is to earn the cash. for a piece of paper, money do really carry a LOT of weight.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

quote of the day

When others do not share the same views as you,
it does not mean that they are wrong.
When the crowd are larger in numbers,
the voices are louder;
but it does not mean that they are right.

a lot to lose

alcohol played a big role in society.maybe lots don agree with my opinion well, try to go to the link below to know more. lets hear to the expert.



Monday, April 21, 2008


prom was last nite.although everyone or just me, was tired.really tired.as arrived late and need wake up early for lab. no, there was no alcohol, but i feel wasted and tired.and a tiny bit cold. the whole thing started on saturday.


kok jin@ peaCock, juen jie and kean + me went to 1u. as they all need get their prom attire.walk around 1u, searchin for what is needed.the shopping stops for a while when we fill our tummy at nandos.

we catch a movie after that. "escape from huang shi" featuring chow yun fat, michelle yeoh,jonathan reese myhrs. its based on a true story of a journalist's life while he diggin for story at china during the japanese invasion.

after getting all the clothes and shoes, we went to visit the reptile exhibit. left 1u for puchong to eat hawker as dinner, then we went to the marriot hotel to find the way for sunday night.


at lunch, P cock Jin, waiting to go to get a hair cut. Juen jie n kean n kok jin getting their hair done. we met shereen and kim @ Mc D, as P cock, havent taken his lunch.kim and shereen is waiting for their make up artise to come to kim's place to help them for the night. so we went to the nearby Jusco as a Saloon was there. we decide to drop by kim's place which is so nearby to see what they look like. eric and all kim's housemate as there too.as i TRY to be nice that nite, i wont want to say anything. we left and i catch a few wings. den wai luen come over while pei se, fresh from melaka's make up place. already waiting at guard house.

kean and JJ(further) getting their hair cut

frank-en-foong in the making

Saturday, April 19, 2008

enchanted night preview

the papers that carries a lots of weight,rm 890 to be exact

prom in a few hours.since its 2am now and i planning to sleep late as there is nothing to do in the morning and afternoon, unless teman-ing my hsemate go cut hair la. anyhow, this can be said my frist official prom. i mean normally i just go to others, and be partner. but now for ONCE i can say, its MY prom. the first prom i went, was HELP's license to thrill a level's prom.with the sayang, ashley.i still remember once i arrived at roma termini which something like our Kl sentral where the train from the airport stops. i went suit hunting right away. in the end got at the mall at Florence. well, this time around, i got a set of cufflings from Roaul. thanks to my mom who was unusually generous that day :p

"so who u bringing as partner ar?" got asked that a few time after people know am going to prom. well, i once told her "you will ONLY b my partner", so as she is far away in nott, i will b flying solo that night with the company of my friends where we had our table. all 10 of us.which is not that bad as many would have the idea, a guy MUST have a partner for prom. which personally i think is wrong as we also can have fun with frens cant we?

i won't dance,
don't ask me
I won't dance madame with you
My heart won't let my feet do things that they should do..
I won't dance, merci beacoup.

the song have a catchy tune to it don you think?do hope things go smoothly and most important of all everyone have a great time. till den, am singing out!

Friday, April 18, 2008

stroll on brats lane

the invite

saturday morning rain is not pouring.. hardly catch a deep sleep last nite. been waking up trying cimb clicks.anyhoo, today is shopping day for prom.prom which is tomorrow. kinda to think bout it, i got another mail, asking to do some charity job @ the children hospital. as some might not belive i am a shy boy, i bet lots wont belive i love to help too.the sad thing is, brat's always have an event that is near my exams or when am not free, for example the home coming camp where only selected members from each camp they conduct throughout the year gathers, ahh... such exclusiveness, as asst.editor i was selected that year,anyhow i gave my seat to Madeline. and now,as much i would like to join the activities i been forced to withdraw to avoid trouble. i have a lovely time in Penang,except maybe i should mingle more with the others, instead, of not getting distracted.lots of friends i've made, tho none as close as b4.i had my fun,and best of all,even my craziest idea or suggestion, had a serious consideration from everyone.though some of you like Josephine already in Aussie, or Cav might go to US, and Jc busy working for Klue, somehow hope to meet with all of u one day..

Julians and cathrines

matt,the roommate.Penang-free school student

farah,melanie and hoong

the metals and the magnet =p

already a celeb status? =p


a friend called me earlier.a close and good friend. it took me by suprise as i was boarding the train from klia.go there to clear up my mind. looking at those who greet their loved one home, makes me feel happy for them and at the same time envy them, with all the pilot walking around, sigh.... but it does get worst for me as i can only listen to his story or his rant. i feel like i cant do anything to help him,because........... to cut the story short, we cant force other do the thing they don like. i mean even a big star like david beckham, got chased out of man u because the manager dont want him there no more, what else could he do ? no matter if he treat man u players like his own family or the love he have for man u, he cant force others decision, and in this case, the manager.

Thursday, April 17, 2008

tip of the ice berg

friends influence is never a doubt. i mean, sometimes our friends can do some bad things, like smoke or drink, yes we might say, we wont follow them, even though they smoke, we still be friend with them but wont get influence. but how much of friends influence can we resist? like our friends might go to club every week, while we are at home, study our butt off.or, we have a sensitive friend, that cant take joke, as the closer we get to them, a tiny bit at LEAST of the sensi part is for sure to rub it on us.

coming into uni, i've met various kind of friends. its not like high school no more, where after a fight with chair flying around the class, the next day, we have a good laugh on the football pitch.after so long, i still cant put my feet firm and settle down here. i mean, one can be hated from other for no apparent reason. sarcastic remarks,envy or being hated for being a bit more fortunate, and some even just because of a dinner, turn their back, and start to stop talking.as ridicilous as that all sound.

one scenario is, take is as when you walk at the mall and some guy drive a mercs and park at the valet.he have a sunglass on and a staright face. does that mean that guy is snobbish?or is there any reason for you to don like him? i mean, his mercs is the symbol of his fortune, or success.if he is posh, let him be, he is luckier than you, it might not be fair but hey, thats life, some are luckier than others, if everyone drive a mercs, who would be the alam flora? he is not showing off with the glasses and the huge car nor boasting, he just showing the fact. thats what he drive, so just be it.while others might drive a local car, or a smaller car. that the fact.

joking around can be quite harmful to yourself, when some cant take the joke.some might have PMS on that day, regardless guy/girl, OR they are just not born with some sense of humour.i missed the class room feel where laughter and seriousness in such a good balanced.

some other sad part is, some would think they are up there, above the rest.some when they have a lil knowledge of something would think they would be worship thus, lost their humble-ness. while some would think they are a class above the rest- erm......excuse me, i guess u never heard of gucci or salvatore ferragamo before? sorry if your fashion capitol is NOT milan ya.

typing and talking lots here, might get me in trouble with the so called "ISA" of the place here.and the punishment? get isolate like a certain hak cai.oh wait, since when i give a crap? you are nobody to ask me to stop talking or blogging.

World Earth Day‏

remember the KL freeze @ pavillion?
well, in conjunction of world's earth day, its happening again, these are the details for those who are interested

Freeze for: 5 minutesFreeze
at : 8pm
When : Sunday 20th April
Where : Sunway Pyramid

but the twist it:

"Have sunglasses on and a paper fan to symbolise global warming, Freeze with a group of people picking up litter to symbolise the pollution, or with a flourescent light bulb to symbolise saving energy, with an LRT ticket/on a bicycle to symbolise means of transportation which will help reduce CO2 emissions. Or perhaps with a face mask on to symbolise air pollution, or with a crushed hair spray aerosol bottle to symbolise anti-CFC releasing products. Or you can even Freeze with a plant/small tree in a pot with a bandage around the stem/trunk to "save a tree"."

its for a good cause, so come lets promote and most important implement what we are promoting which is saving the world from disastor.too bad i'll be at prom, but, those who are free, do please spend some time, plus am sure it be a great fun.oh ya, you MIGHT, have your pics taken and published in a majot local newspaper.


the most random pose..

love for jazz

assignment is DONE!! hopefully, don have any last minutes changes. if all goes well, it means that this is the first time i don have to be awake till the next morning to finish it off. yay me!

anyways, today post is all that blues and jazz and some cabaret. maybe some might not know, i have a fancy to these kinda music. the prefered music to dance to instead of dj.teisto blasting almost all the club around the world, i would prefer more to the sax,some double bass play and some jazz singer,ahhhhhhhhhh........ just make me shake my legs. the age where marilyn monroe, use to rule, and the local club played by the likes of louis armstrong, and the dance are more decent than we have nowadays.

i cant remember when the first time i heard a jazz record but, the first live performance, i saw is at the JW marriot, KL. i was there for my birthday celebration, maybe around form 1? not that sure but i was young at the time, the the likes of linkin park, and eminem rule the airwave.thus, i am not expose that much to jazz music. till, i heard jane monheit's duet with micheal buble. of course, before that michael buble's hit like the cover version of "come fly with me" was a big hit for me. somehow, muscic lidat just make me tap my legs, move my shoulder, and sometimes hip. the syok-ness i found in the long note of the trumpet, or the double bass playing as the background, and the brush hitting on the drum, such relaxing feeling.

for prom, i wish that i went to the o5 prom at MMu, where Lin, the director of the event told me, she hired a 3 or 5 piece jazz band.ahh.. classy-ness. too bad i wasnt in MMu that time. for prom this time, am not too sure bout the music, but the biasa teens band music shall be the music i assume, but than again i could be wrong.

the sad reality is, jazz singer hardly visit Malaysia to have concert.mostly they will be at the states or some part of europe. the crave of wanting to go to NY, just like the movie " the terminal' or they say, New orleans is the house of blues. anyhow, a chance to catch, buble or jane monheit at least ONCE in my life will be like a dream come true. or Tony Bannet would be great too.jazz bar, or longue is not much that i heard of here. maybe sometimes alexis at ampang. or the italian restaurant @ the royale bintang at bukit bintang.

oh well, guess i should stop dreaming of it that much while trying to listen to more of Jane, that reminds me, i din get her latest album yet...shit, need save up and pay for the album instead of buying other things... kickboxing time!

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

His eyes leaked

and she stood there doing absolutely nothing.

She didn't even have the courage to hold him in her arms and brush through his hair.

His fragile heart was bleeding profusely right in front of her eyes.

His heavy sobbing filled up his wavered voice.

She couldn't help but to be afraid when she saw the man who used to be the foundation of her life in the state of grief

After so long, they know their emotions are still attached to each other deeply. What's the real reason behind all these unnecessary tears and torturing pain when both of them can find their way back to each other?

vivid dream/ nightmare

" he look at his phone, its 13 june 2008. and its 7 A.m. today is the day. he got a match today. his first fight. he drag himself to the kickboxing ring. his opponent on that day is,a super fit chinese dude with various of experience. its a battle of david vs goliath. as soon as the bell rang, his face was greeted by crosses and jabs he was trashed. kick to his rib, and to his mid section, but he is determined to stay up.one lucky break he got, when he able to catch his opponent's leg when being attacked, and he quickly kick his opponent's standing leg with all his might, lucky for him, his opponent twisted his leg and cant compete no more.

no doubt he was hurt badly. but he put on a brave face and quickly rush to the airport. his fren drove him there right from the ring. he tried to hide the bruises and cuts. he waited at the arrival hall. suddenly a lady pulled him and say something harsh to him and the lady don't want to ever see him again. he collapse. its because the internal injury his suffered, his mouth is full of blood spilling out, right after the lady tell him off. his fren who drove him there quickly rushed to him, and yelled at the lady "this is all YOUR fault and YOUR doing, he is like this now,instead of getting mad at you, he punished himself. are you happy now?!" the crowd of people gather and the ambulance came. the lady disappear to her family.while he was rushed into the ambulans, she walked out of the arrival gate and was greeted by the lady. she wonder where is he. he is not there, so she guess, that he don care anymore. her mind started to lingering to singapore, where she spend her holidays with the person from singapore and they flew back to south east asia togather along with her tot of visiting another one at sarawak. as she think back all the happy memories she had during her holiday, the ambulans with him inside take over her car and rushed to the nearest hospital. in the end, he the chances of telling her how he felt,faded slowly as his blood and oxygen level decrease sharply......"

he woke up, holding his kickboxing gloves, with a sigh of relieve its only some crazy dream.

Tuesday, April 15, 2008


"understand others to be understand" some old lady once told me. but there are lots kinda people that i don understand, for instant, alcoholic, lala, players, those who are busy hitting on chics that are already taken, clubbers, those that love to turn their back on their friends-when the fren did nothing, those crazy obsess for cash, those who cant put their priority straight, welll the list can go on and on and on...

the failure for me to understand them is because....................... i don even know myself why people do the thing they do. everytime a troubled teen rant " you wont understand" well, maybe cause u don tell, that why nobody understand, BUT, if u already tell, express your guts out, and still the same outcome, that means they choose NOT to understand. life can be that cruel sometimes, as we cant force others to understand us. sometimes not even those that who are close to you, well, thats the sad reality of life.

1 more the guys

" the girl normally change things and create the prob in a relationship" i heard that before, and today i heard that again, to my suprise, girls are the one telling me.diff people, but same thinking. what happen to those that we see, guys with mistress the flirticious one, the one that is not loyal, feels like it just how people wants to potray that on soaps. yes, i cant generalize it, and every guy/girl relationship is based on case to case.

but, is there some truth to the statement? is the guy who is bored or it just an excuse for the girl who is actually the one who is bored to scout around, to find a so called better one. and in a case of a break up, of course as a nature of the world, the world would take on the girl side and take pity for her, and the guy seems like he world's most guilty person, or like hitler.

what is a "better" choice? is it the CGPA's? money? overseas education? good looking? bad boys? well, money, CGPA, overseas education, that does put a lot of weight into the guy's profile. BUT, how can u tell one's future when he is at his 20's or 30's? how many bill gates are there? i mean, one can be a bum NOW, but hey, life is funny, that bum you see 10 years ago might be a CEO by then, and your so called "better" choice or prince charming, well, can be the bum's worker. who can really tell rite? good looking and sweet talking might just be another reason for girls to fall and consider that as a "better" choice.well, maybe not all the girls. maybe the current bf might sometimes be green of envy, or not all that you expect and not perfect or good enough for you, to be happy and proud of to tell your family and friends, but me myself personally belive that as long as someone treat you with a sincere heart that is good enough, but i know, some might be more demanding than me, as some girls would make a car as a requirement for a bf, or fancy dining etc. but i guess that my own opinion, if others would want to have more demand, just cant help it lah...

money sometimes can make one blind.even rich people sometimes want their daughter to marry a rich guy, from a well to do family.generally, rich people are more luckier than others, like the sayin goes "born with a silver spoon" i mean they have have access to lots of things, even they have the look. like "rich" people look. clean shaved, perfectly pluck eye brow, and hair that matches their look. sound oh so dreamy rite girls? instead of the not so rich one that have unorganised hairdo, scar at their face, and dark skin, just like some indon factory worker.

lots say the guy who is afraid to commit. but if the girls are the one scouting around, what a guy are suppose to do?as we can see, not all, but some guys go great length just to put the smile on the gf face. i mean, realisticly, if you are a florist, would you offer a bouquet of roses on valentine to a girl to buy or a guy? or do you see any girls ditch their friend to be with their bf? instead the bf are the one missed the yam cha session with the guys just to accomodate. its not a rant, i mean, its like a second nature to guy to ditch their friends appointment, and their friends would certainly understand, but after all that we all do, do we get appreciated?even if we go and fetch your younger siblings, to win their small heart, while you out with some other guys or with your best friends. to put it on paper is it fair? and the funny part is, girls want equal rights?be fair to us guys and we all play fair too.

guys ego. everytime there is an agruement between guys and girls, for sure the girl would say " he have so much of ego, for not wanting to apologise" but, seriously, if the girls are the one merajuk-ing, aren't we guys the one that pujuk? or even if an arguement where we are so RIGHT, we are the one who pick up the phone to apologise first? and how is that "guy" ego? to be fair again, guy/girls are human, both make mistakes sometimes along the way, but do girls apologise ar?

Monday, April 14, 2008

open minded?

the video of the malaysia genius,being interviewed by UK newspaper

its often said that malaysia society is NOT open minded, and how the people in western country are OPEN and not a narrow minded. but really, where is the limit? of being open minded? being a prostitute and having sex around? if that what they mean by open minded, den its anyone can call me closed minded.

monday blues?

cure your monday blues..

kl freeze!


Sunday, April 13, 2008

danke mom

good a suprise gift from mom yesterday :D



p/s : don we all love gifts? :D

Friday, April 11, 2008

Starry, starry night

Starry, starry night
Paint your palette blue and grey
Look out on a summer's day
With eyes that know the darkness in my soul

practising and trying to improve "kroko" is not really working great without a feeder, sits ups wont work with a painful tummy from the human stampede.if only i would have a car, i would be at the subang studio now. the sigh of a sleepless night..

Now you think you know
What I tried to say to you
And how I suffered for my sanity
And how I tried to set them free
They would not listen
They're not listening still
Perhaps they never will....

Wednesday, April 9, 2008


have any of you guys ever wonder why always skin product always related to woman. there are not much of guy skin product out there compared to the woman,well, today i found one that is NOT so bad. MENTHOLATUM'S CHARCOAL FACE WASH.it might look a bit grey and thick like texture like a face mask, and don't smell as good as Dove, it don have a smell at all or have the micro bits like the Neautrogena,and don't really feel "fresh" like those other 2 brand but its not bad. really! plus Charcoal is a natural absorbent, thus can absort those oil from your face.


Tuesday, April 8, 2008

against the odd

"am walking in the rain... what a glorious feeling..." thats the song lah, it was raining just now, so decided to leave the library with wai luen and yee kean, as wai luen gonna go home, and before i stuck at the library till midnight coz the rain don seem to stop, it seems like a good idea, to follow them back.thanks wai luen.

walking in the rain have lots of flasback of a memory. one of it, is when one of fat chinese fren, come to the class with the gossip of the day. " eh, they all walk in the rain, and play play in the rain during the sport practise" was at wat? form 1 or 2? i just laugh it of with a smile on my face while non of them could see, my fist, are ready to pounce in anger, but that time it was just one way i suppose.thus, thats nothing much i could do that time, though now its diff.

against all odd- the song that been playing so frequently on my i-pod lately, over and over again.

You're the only one
Who really knew me at all
So take a look at me now
'Cause there's just an empty space
And you coming back to me,
is against the odds
And that's what i gotta face..
the song too have another fond memories. the first time i heard it,when i bought westlife's coast to coast album from the road side at gurney, and after that, quickly run up the apartment and put it in the player, i still remember how my lil cousin complain on why i keep on playing the song over and over again, while i stayed at the balcony enjoying the breeze from the nearby beach,while my mind flying elsewhere, thinking of...
some odd are almost impossible to overcome, especially when its out of our hand. but maybe is what we do to make the odd go higher and higher.just like me, stacking the odd higher for my own self. i got nobody to blame BUT myself, for everything that have happened. the fingers are on me, and also the blame on me.
don we always think we are good?i mean, we might think we are better than others.for example, i think that noobody else wanted to be a pilot as bad as i do, but when i go for the interview test, there are lots other that know more about planes than me. as for today presentation, i don think i did good enough. i mean i always tot of presenting some paper work next time in the working world, and good presentation skills can be very useful, thus, tone, body language and all that plays huge role, and today, i don think am anywhere near, to impress Trump or anybody.
wonder when will the odd getting lesser and lesser. the harder i try, the greater the odds.but hey, you bring it all to yourself, nobody to blame but yourself- thats wat i alaways try to remind me.

Monday, April 7, 2008


its "almond"

pronounce as:




the weekend that was

i finally "graduate from my "p" license as i collect the lesen "besar" on saturday, which resulted to me driving this morning all the way to cyber. or just to train me to drive long distance since i be moving soon and i hardly drive around KL.
well, after collecting the license, me and my sister went to Bansar Village. Basil. a Thai "nudle bar"- according to them la. they have a few branch around and 2 at 1u, with different name. the one we ate for new year's eve, ash, if u remember. anyways, according to my sister, the place is owned by one of my dad's fren, and my sister have been there for lots of time with him. argh!! the down side of staying FAR.the bihun red tom yam was great. spicy but not too spicy. and since she just got her pay, she paid for ONCE!follow her shop in the morning after she dropped off her office coat for dry cleaning. so now u know where i got my patience for waiting for people shopping? some few funny t-shirt caught my eyes too, and so do my shirt for prom, but den again, am on a tight budget. oh well... in the evening my sister and my parents go furniture hunting. i decided not to go, so i stayed home layaning Jane, Jane Monheit on the player while doin Matrix. which remind me that i din not get her latest album yet, but den AGAIN!, BUDGET!. the only singer that i buy the ori copy. and hopefully she come here for a concert.plus the day is rainy, and i feel like layaning jazzy music, so there goes my evening. watched the arsenal and liverpool match and after that some Akedemi Fantasia, i have to say, this season, the standard getting lower and lower. den off again revising MAths, and did some research for presentation on Tuesday- TOMORROW!!!, oh ya, my brother came back during the first half of the football match. not to forgetting that i go for Ramli burger hunting after akedemi fantasia. i wanted Roti tissue at ss2 or go Murni, but den again, the elder siblings wanted Burger. so From BSC to Ali Maju @ help, to Bangsar, finally there only 1 stall opened at the Lrt. 3 ramli for 8bux. the hell? on the way back i got some escort from some old frens. the mat rempit people, happen to know both of them so, the 2 bike escort my car to my hse. :p think i done at 3 am that nite, slept after math.
sunday morning, the rain was not pouring, instead my bro's hp normally being a pest. keep on bising. and the person himself also bising ask everyone wake up for breakfast. i don feel too good, but have to layan, since its rare that everyone is back. we accompany our parents to go teak wood furniture hunting, mirror and also lighting hunting. tiring day, my head spins and its SO hot. watch the man U match. i know i always got a bad feeling when they play boro. man U barely get the point. a disappointing nite. but the weekend also been disappointing really.oh well, thats life i suppose.

Sunday, April 6, 2008

MSN's on: Are you dating a player?

  • 5 signs you could have a player on your hands… He’s bold. For the player, the pickup is a game. He doesn’t approach women with the same nerves or awkwardness of a normal guy.
  • He’ll walk up confidently, with a big smile and great eye contact. His manner will be smooth and put-together. This doesn’t mean you should look for the opposite — a stuttering wreck — but be wary of a guy who acts completely bulletproof. A little anxiety is natural.
  • He declares his feelings right away. Players employ a “fast come-on,” according to Dr. Kalish, making sweeping statements of affection (e.g., “You’re the most perfect woman I’ve ever met”) from the word go. These declarations can feel very welcome, especially if you’ve been in a string of relationships that lacked such intimacy. Just remember that true closeness takes time, and it’s normal for a guy to be more guarded about his emotions.
  • He always plans romantic dates. Dating for the player is kind of a performance art. And he’s going to be good at it. “He won’t just bring a box of chocolates,” Dr. Kalish warns. “He’ll take you to a state fair and offer to share cotton candy.” Nice guys can be romantic, too, but life with them won’t always feel like a John Cusack movie. Non-stop rooftop picnics and weekends at the cottage could be too much.
  • He has lots of acquaintances, no close friends. The player tends to be a lone wolf. That doesn’t mean he lacks for drinking buddies. The same way he charms women, he can charm lots of people in his life. The key is that, in friendship as in romance, his affections run broad but not deep. If solid pals are hard to come by with this guy, consider yourself warned.
  • He’s a thrill seeker. A guy who spends his spare time looking for a rush — fast driving, bungee jumping, kite-boarding, heli-skiing — should give you pause. This type, says Dr. Kalish, craves the high that comes from conquering a difficult challenge, and that goes for his relationship goals as well. Once he’s “conquered” you, your allure may quickly fade. …

And 5 signs he’s just a nice, upstanding guy

  • He’s goofy. The sincere suitor is not suave. He doesn’t always say the right thing. It may sound weird to go into a date hoping for a pratfall, but it’s not a bad thing. “Believe me,” Dr. Kalish says. “The false charmer does not trip. He knows where his feet are at all times.”
  • He remembers personal details and events. It’s the most basic way to show someone you care—by learning about his or her life and interests. Players can’t be bothered with this. One of the most common complaints Dr. Kalish fielded about false charmers was that they failed to show up at important events. “They are narcissists,” she says. “Dating is all about them.” Trifling as it sounds, if a guy remembers to bring over your favorite ice cream or shows up at your pal’s birthday party, he might just be a keeper.
  • He treats his mama right. Generally speaking, a loving family begets a loving person, and the opposite is also true. Dr. Kalish often heard about alcoholism in the families of insincere boyfriends. While this might incite an understandable desire for you to reach out and help, you should also be cautious. The wounded outcast who is betrayed by his parents makes a hot lead in a soap, but not the best boyfriend. Try the good-hearted guy who flies home for his mom’s birthday instead.
  • He can mingle. “The sincere guy doesn’t mind being in a room with people who are more accomplished than he is,” Dr. Kalish says. Conversely, the player wants to be in situations that will glorify only himself, especially around his woman. He doesn’t want to listen to another man’s interesting story. A loving guy, on the other hand, can mix with others even when he’s not the star of the show, and actually enjoys learning things from them.
  • He says, “I love you.” As fawning as a player’s affections are, there’s still something sacred about the L-bomb. Kalish found that insincere men would say, “I want to grow old with you,” or “I want to have children with you,” but “I love you” remained somehow off limits. A guy who says those three magic words may very well mean them.


he feels tired, his head is spinning,his forehead is as hot as he think he is, he need to drown his head in water and close his eye to stop the head go spining round and round, his shoulders feel heavy, and yet he need to pack for another week, just when he in need of a break, and yet the weekend don seem he have any... sigh..

Friday, April 4, 2008

who r we?

Arrived home today after 2 weeks. The weather here has been badly. Heavy rain every evening. More like a storm. And its not even the monsoon season yet. Green house effect I suppose?

The reason I blog, or sometimes put so “emo” post, just to express how I felt at that particular time. Yes I could keep it to myself, but I feel lots easier to just let it out instead of keeping it inside, and maybe it can help any of the reader, that maybe 1 day, could relate to how I felt at that particular time. If it’s a sad time, maybe, you reader might feel, “ hey, am not that bad after all”. I mean, when I feel down, its good to know that, its not only me feel that same way, its like a normal thing, and maybe those stories/ experience from others, could help me to recover. I wont deny that everyday my day is perfect and I cant at the top everytime. I do belive that everyone have their off day right? So my purpose is to help, please do not judge, though I wont give a crap. And sometimes, I wanted to share some of my experience of show you guys something that maybe u all don see before, please do not think am showing off. I mean, is it wrong to share your trip’s experience with your mate’s if u know ur mates haven’t been to those places? Is that showing off? If you all think so, I think you all should stop visiting the blog, thank you.

The question that been on my mind lately is, “ do we really know who we are?”. Not pointing any fingers at anyone, take me for example. I will be honest here, that I once think that, “its my way or no way”, or “so stupid wan ar that fella do so much for her”,I wont fall for anyone so hard, that I will be willing to do so much, I wont beg anyone for anything, I am shy to approach people, I think black people are violent, clubbin and drinking is bad, girls that wear leggin are “lala”, and fishnets are for hookers, those who love to wear micro mini might as well not wear anything and lots more.

But its so much different NOW. I mean, there is no prize for guessing who I have fallen hard for. And things am willing to do, I cant be stubborn anymore, leggin are “OK” .

One day while walking to the library after computer lab with vi ling, she say her fren and greet her, at the fren was wearing some ultra high boots, similar to the one that u go for horse riding, that’s how high the boots are. For me personally, it look UGLY. Then while getting lunch with wai luen and yee kean the next day, I saw that girl again, this time with another boots, this time, with lots of funny design, like a cowboy. I do think like “ wth”, but, thinking back, its true what vi ling said, “she might find it is nice looking, so its up to her”. The point is, other people have their own cup of tea, and their tea might not be the same as mine.

Changes, acceptance, and embracing. Its something that that can be easy to some. I quote pei se “ be flexible than your life wont b so sucky”. Maybe that can be easier said than done, for me, as I do have my own opinion on things and my own stand for example, the opposition winning big last election might not be a good thing, as what we all need is stability, but I know lots of you DAP fans out there might think its differently. And I do try to accept what you guys think, because its your opinion and everyone is entitle to their own opinion. 1 month or so more am leaving. Another chapter shall be flipped. Saying goodbye to Bangsar, a place that I spend most of my time growing up. Friends and enemy I made, places I know where to get my stuff. Everything is so convenient, but sadly Mr.Gan have to retire. Moving to Klang, near Bukit Tinggi. Maybe if I tell also, some might say “damn far wei, or damn ulu wei” but no choice lor. Adjusting to a new environment means I have to travel further to reach home from cyber, means more money shall be spend traveling, and I cant order chicken rice instead need to say “ chee wan e ker” or “ kay peng”.

Language IS a barrier for me. Yes is not secret that I AM a banana. Never a day I feel like an alien when others talking Chinese around me. Don everyone would feel that way? Like if you go to study in Russia and your frens talk Russian with each other, how would anyone feel rite? 2 years having people speaking Chinese without understand whats goin on around me, guess am immune to it. Some words I MIGHT understand but den again, it seems hopeless.

Growing up, I followed my dad to travel when am free. Weekends, school holidays. When he was the regional manager at the east coast last time, me and my whole family have to follow him to visit each and every station only we could reach my grandma place for the weekly visit. Witnessing an old man getting scold because of sleeping during the job, and those porter cleaning up the station, even the toilet as a preparation for the sultan’s visit, got me feel bad for them as my dad one giving them instruction. But now, I feel that they deserve the scolding, as in the working world, u CANT sleep! While on duty especially if u the one taking care of the gate. What if some train come and the gate is NOT close for the cars? Lots might lose their life. But the traveling got less when we come to KL, till am around form 3 onwards. But this time, to the northern region. I been to places that I never been before, like Ipoh, Taiping, Penang, Bukit Kayu Hitam. Although this time more for leisure, but its an eye opener for me. Normally every holiday I would probably come down to KL to shop during the December break. And when am at KL, I go back Kelantan to visit my grandma. I have to say I kinda like it there at the northern region, from Clearwater golf club, to the old Ipoh town where the dim sum there are served by those old old aunty and those uncle, aunty just back from their jog or tai chi, have a meal with their friends. Things are peaceful, a good change of pace from busy KL. And goin penang, one morning, while I was on holiday, I still saw old unlce on bicycle. At the speed at he is goin, he would be knocked down dead in KL’s road. Its also different from the busy, hectic Penang with the jam I experience before that morning, around the bridge and Gurney area. Somehow, Penang is a mix of both busy and relax.

One the highway while I was on the backseat, dreaming at and admiring the blue sky, it never fails me everytime it made me amuse, that we have a great thing right here on our own backyard. I mean, look at the green paddy field along the highway after penang, am not sure if its kedah or perlis, it do look amusing, of course we would love to go places like those we say in the movie like Lord of The Ring, where they have the HUGE field, but we have our own special and unique place right here. Though the world is HUGE, 1 thing still remain, when and where only we would know who we are? What kinda person we are? Selfish? Stubborn? Dump? Mature?

Tuesday, April 1, 2008


the story behind the t-shirt

a great song by Ollie Sebastian, the botak one i think

In your holiness

I find redemptions song

i watch them in KL, a few years ago @ adore 04 i think.they are awesome. but most important of all i felt You. i know i might lost my way along the year. and looking at the mirror, i saw stranger looking at me, i dono who is that person staring back at me, and i do things that i never cross my mind that i would do. please open the door for my return. amen.

when it all goes wrong.



"My view is that people can blame childhood to a certain extent, but there also comes a point where you have to take responsibility for your own actions".

31st march baby

happy b'day sis

happy b'day roomate(squart down with my hand on his head) a.k.a god of gambler