the road not taken

empty

transition period. mayb thats what am facing all this while, since uni start, things are not really as lovely like the old days. the 1 year stint at melaka, and now the 4 years stint at cyberjaya..guess, i never really trully settle down. my studies, life style. din really find the perfect balance of stud and having fun time, without facing bump along the way.. like someday i have lab, so i need go back early, sometimes, my parents complain bout me goin out too much. sometimes, there nobody to go out with.

lots of friends have change during the course. i mean, the good thing bout it is, at least i can see their true colours, but on the other hand, i kinda think what a waste of all the good time all of US had. at times i just wanna go back with a vengence and sometimes i just feel tired of holding grudges.. this is MY main problem.. not bout them all.. it is i cant decide what i wanted in any matter.

its middle of the year, and i think the next half of the year, things will change too

• first, next month, Malaysia will turn 50, and Ashley who have been my pillar for the last 6 month, will receive her result whether she will b leaving to further her studies.. i really don wan her to go, but the move seems already confirm, she is a smart girl and am sure she will make the grade. and for her future point of view, i guess its good for her to go.but from my point of view it is bad. AGAIN, am stuck in to between to choices which i cant decide


• and as planned i will b moving to bukit tinggi at the end of the year. i dowan to say goodbye to bangsar. everything here seems nice. i mean its so easy and convinient, and i can easily to walk and the people i know is mostly here. so i wont b able order food at chinese stall, in english, instead i have to use chinese, which am not good at. and i will b surrounded by LALA's which are eye sores. and i need wake up at least 2 hours earlier if i wanted to go to mid V, because it will b 30 minutes away but all depends on the traffic. instead of the 5 minutes drive to mid V now, or the 10 minutes walk.


• my grades are just lack of a few point from letting me applying cadet pilot position at top airlines company, thus i need to wait for 4 years and hopefully my grade will b up to the standard

what a fella need to do to get things his way? i wont know what actually might happen.. but all those 3 things just seems unavoidable. i shall go study now. i know the ONLY way is to up my grades, than only i could consider NY, LONDON or SYDNEY. by 2009 i hope..

****thin pong ngo ho ma****